people who vacuum first and then dust
I will never understand why stripping is seen as degrading.
Like…the job description is literally “I am so hot that you could never get me in real life so you’re going to have to pay me to dance for you.”
trust no hand but your own
au where everything is black and white until you meet your soulmate
ADDITIONALLY: when your soulmate dies, the world goes back to black and white
THAT’S HORRIBLE i love it
No but can you imagine having a normal day at work or running errands but then everything suddenly goes black and white.
LEAVE MY LIFE
I love the beginning of the introduction of countries at the olympics because it starts off with the smaller countries
you know just little groups
out of nowhere
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING